Skip to main content

Drippy Harps, part one

Are you a drip? Do you harp a lot? I heard this rotten joke recently: "My wife is a perfect angel; she's always up in the air harping on something." Yikes! Is this me? Is this you?

When we allow ourselves to become casual in our relationships with our husbands, we can easily slip into the role of the "drippy harp:" a contentious woman who nags and criticizes while convincing herself that she's just being honest and helpful. Deliver me from such help! We would never want to be treated in the way that we mistreat our spouses!

We'll examine this one over several segments, but here's the first one:

1. If you won't let a matter drop, you're a drip.
"A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike." (Prov. 27:15)
You may not realize it, but your repeated "suggestions" translate into "criticims" over time. Bringing an issue to someone's attention once is reasonable; twice is reminding; three times and beyond is full-tilt nagging. You may think that you're being helpful, but if you turned it around and put yourself on the receiving end of your repeated statements, you may be able to hear it differently.

When we've asked our men to do (or not to do) something, they heard us the first time. If we bring it up again, it's certain that they heard. If we try a third time...drip, drip, drip: we've become contentious. A contentious woman is trying to win, even though she often loses. So what's a woman to do?

Pray for wisdom, choose your words carefully, speak them lovingly at the right time and then wait patiently. And dump your expectations for a perfect resolution, because those are fairy tale thoughts invading your good sense. After a period of quiet and prayerful waiting, the answer may not be the solution you had in mind, because God sees differently than we see. God can see the whole picture; we only see our part.

Don't be a drip. Instead of bringing up the same matter over and over again, take it to the Lord. He doesn't mind how often you repeat yourself!

If this website has been a blessing to you, please visit the Shop page and consider buying a book or CD set. We appreciate your support of Keep the Heart!
www.keeptheheart.com 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Petty Little Things

You worked hard on that church event, but nobody recognized it. You aren't speaking to someone because you're holding a grudge over an offense that's so old it's growing mold. Your family wasn't personally invited to the fellowship (even though it was open to all), so you're considering changing churches. There is not one life-changing issue in this list of oversights, but it's often the little things that trigger big deals. Petty little things. Pettiness is a cause of many unnecessary disputes, leading people to have their days end poorly. Are you allowing some small thing to keep you trapped in a swirling cloud of negative emotions? When we do this, we're being petty, and it hurts us and repels others. Pettiness is a lot like a flu virus; once you catch it, people don't want to get too close, and you will need to get over it before you can function again. Pettiness comes when we allow minor issues to morph into major offenses.  When we re...

Was He Trying to Pick a Fight or...?

Why does the garage door malfunction ONLY when we're planning a big event? Or a trip? Or both? Blame it on Murphy's Law? Who was Murphy, anyway? Edward Aloysius Murphy ,  Jr.  (January 11, 1918 – July 17, 1990) was an American aerospace engineer who worked on safety-critical systems. He is best known for his namesake Murphy's law, which is said to state, "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong." ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_A._Murphy_Jr. ) Okay all right, so an aerospace engineer is to blame for the poor timing of everything? I don't believe it. But I do believe that God allows things to happen so that He can have His way. The bright orange sticker on the wall in the garage (slapped unceremoniously over the bright yellow sticker on top of the silver sticker) listed the garage door company's phone number. Why do the repairmen paste their company labels on top of the others? Competition? Well then, why not just remove the other ...

Parents Are Not Responsible for That

Parenthood is not a role for wimps or whiners. There are the exciting times such as music recitals, sports tournaments, and graduations. But if your tribe is like ours, you've probably also had the maddening moments, like the time one of our children discovered how to unfasten the tapes on his diaper and used the contents as "chalk" on the bedroom  wall (yes, it was "his," so that narrows the field of suspects). Children are young for a few blinks, and then we spin around and we're hearing "Pomp and Circumstance," that familiar graduation march as our "babies" walk down the aisle in cap and gown. If they choose to go on to college, four snaps later, we're sitting in the auditorium at their college graduation, scanning a long list of names in the commencement bulletin while waiting to watch them walk across the platform to receive yet another diploma. It's warp-speed fast (except that diaper stage). Parents don't min...